When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand
and said, I've got something to tell you... She sat down and ate
quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.


Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know
what I was thinking. I want a divorce... I raised the topic calmly.


She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me
softly, why? I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw
away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night,
we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to
find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give
her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Dew. I didn't love
her anymore. I just pitied her!


With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated
that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company..


She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had
spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt
sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take
back what I had said for I loved Dew so dearly. Finally she cried
loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her
cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had
obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.


The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing
something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to
sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful
day with Dew.


When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did
not care so I turned over and was asleep again.


In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want
anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce.


She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as
normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his
exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our
broken marriage.


This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to
recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.


She requested that everyday for the month's duration I carry her out
of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going
crazy.. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her
odd request.


I told Dew about my wife's divorce conditions... She laughed loudly
and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has
to face the divorce, she said scornfully…


My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention
was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day,
we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding
mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the
bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten
meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't
tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I
put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I
drove alone to the office.


On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my
chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I
hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time... I realized
she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her
hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute
I wondered what I had done to her.


On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy
returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to
me.


On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was
growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this. It became easier to
carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made
me stronger.


She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few
dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, "all my
dresses have grown bigger... "I suddenly realized that she had grown
so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.


Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in
her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head. Our son
came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mum out. To
him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential
part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and
hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might
change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms,
walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway.
Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body
tightly; it was just like our wedding day.


But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held
her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school.
I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked
intimacy. I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without
locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my
mind.... I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her,
Sorry, Dew, I do not want the divorce anymore. She looked at me,
astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She
said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I won't
divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't
value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other
any more. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our
wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death does us apart.


Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then
slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove
away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers
for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I
smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us
apart. That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my
face, I ran up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.......I
cried and cried uncontrollably and carried her for the last time from
the room to the hall with tears streaming down my face and gazing at
my only son, his tears rolling from his eyes, they made me cry even
more. I had lost my love, my wife and a loving and caring mother and
nothing I could do now to put the clock backward... I had all the time
now to look at her motionless body in detail but I knew it was going
to be only for a short while until she made her last journey to the
Lord.....I held my son and wept again and again thinking of all the
things I did not do for her when she was still alive.........and
placed gently the flowers in her hands with my tears trickling on
them.......she was gone forever, all my tears would not bring her
back.


The small details of your lives are what really matter in a
relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in
the bank, blah...blah... Blah… These create an environment conducive
for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to
be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that
build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!


Moral: It is to value all the things we possess, once they
are gone we have nothing but regrets!